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  • #5208 Reply
    Tammy
    Guest

    Hi everyone, not sure if this has been talked about so I apologize if it has. Here is my problem. Out of what I have been dealt with, i.e., surgery, can not walk, etc. My issue is friends and family. I always thought I was blessed with so many friends and good family, I had done what I could for any of them, if I had extra money and they needed it I shared, lending a helping hand in any physical way. I have always been a generous person, even if I listed the top things I did you all would agree. Let me say, I have never ever expected anything back, never never. I was always more then happy with a hug and a thank you.
    My accident happened in Nov. since then, I have had the people whom I barely know from church bring me and my husband dinners (my husband at the time just had knee replacement 10 days before my knee surgery) and asked if they could help. Fortunately my kids are grown and helped. My point of this, I haven’t received any phone calls from family, one of my sisters calls me,(my husband and I both have a large family) not even a phone call from the people I did the most for. I don’t expect anyone to come do anything, its ok. but, not a phone call? are they afraid I am going to ask them to do something? Then I cant help but think, maybe I was a “bad” person, maybe I see myself in a different way. I just want to see if its me or anyone else.
    Feeling really low about it.

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    • #6275 Reply
      Adele
      Guest

      What’s it take to become a sublime exnuepdor of prose like yourself?

    • #6136 Reply
      Pamela Taylor
      Guest

      Hi everyone
      I am going through the same thing. People who I thought were good friends tell me to not ask them to come over to help when I haven’t even asked them. And other people who are just acquaintances have come forward to lend a hand.
      I have lost a friend over this but have gained so many more.
      Family, except for my wonderful husband, have done nothing.
      I think some people just do not know how to be around people who are laid up.
      God bless them.

    • #6058 Reply
      Tammy
      Guest

      Thank you all! You’re right! I’ve taken your advice and see now how people just don’t get it! It’s good hearing it from others, thanks

    • #5760 Reply
      Eileen
      Guest

      Tammy,

      Sue and Marion have it right. You have found blessings and new friends, and you do need to be patient because many people think “Oh, it’s just a broken leg.” TPF is tragic and debilitating–but as each day gets better you will see your concerns in a new light. Meanwhile, find comfort in those who are willing to help and focus on the what is going right.

      Eileen

    • #5530 Reply
      marion gibbins
      Guest

      Do not be so down try to be positive and look toward the future.Many do not realise how serious an injury you have had ,it took a while for it to sink in for my husband who imagined I would be up to a 12 hr journey and a god daughters wedding just 3 weeks after my accident !

    • #5503 Reply
      Tammy
      Guest

      Sue H
      Thank you, yes, your right. I have discovered people that are wonderful. I have learned to go with the flow for sure. I just cant help but being sad that people are almost afraid to call it seems, as if they will feel asked to help in some way. I have learned who is who for sure.
      thanks for your reply and you are absolutely correct in looking at the good. I have to stop dwelling on the bad, and not feeling wronged in some way. Your words ring in my head about how nasty this break and surgery is, and how emotional it is. I never knew people can break their legs like this. Is nice to have validation sometimes 🙂
      Thank you, blessings to you.

    • #5464 Reply
      Sue H
      Guest

      Hello Tammy,
      I just wanted to say ‘Be kind to yourself’. A tpf is a major and nasty injury and has a big effect emotionally as well as physically. Don’t feel bad about yourself and try just to go with the flow. I sounds like you’re discovering all sorts of good new friends. Perhaps that’s a hidden blessing. I hope you heal well and quickly.

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